Has it been TWO weeks????

Sooooooooo hard to believe that just TWO weeks ago yesterday I was praying to God....thanking him for ALL the blessings he gave me in my life...and for THOSE more yet to come!!! Boy was that an understatement huh???

So the DOC on Friday said all is well. Just gotta get that protein in. PROTEIN and I are NOT friends! Why can't BREAD have protein in it??? Well, the mush meat is over with.....just straight up protein! Now...Ham, and chicken, and.....whatever else was mushed up the first week.....um...well, now.....GROSS!!! My tastes have changed soooo much, and my scents for food even more so. Like when I was pregnant....VERY ODD!!!!

So a TRIP away we went this weekend for Our Nephew Ethan....I thought I was ready....but I was SOOOOO not ready!!! It was 2 1/2 hours in the car, then sitting around at the party....let's just say...italian beef and I did NOT get along, so I was sick til about 2:15 AM!! Horrible day.......but Sunday was better, but I was sooo glad to get OUT of that car!!!

Yesterday I got on the OLD Bike (stationary only for now), and SLOW. I have to say, I missed it! So I will be BACK in form in NO time!!!

I don't go back to the Doc til July 7th, and hopes I will find what else I can do....WEIGHTS!!! And VEGGIES???? BREAD??? (nah just playing with ya!!!)

Today was the first time I was able to DRIVE again.............and in TRUE Linda fashion....it was a CRAZY day!!! From 7:00am until 6:31pm, as I am sitting typing this BLOG!!! I even made dinner for my family!!! But I did GREAT!!! A bit sore, and VERY tired............but ALIVE and CAPABLE!!! What a feeling of normalty I entered again!!! Yippppeeeeeeeeee...if only I could EAT!!!

Yes I said that...EAT!! I never thought in my 42 years on earth I would say that.....but it's getting worse. SO the DOC told me to at least have two protein shakes a day and the 2 oz meat, just so my body doesn't go into starvation mode! I FEEL LIKE I AM DRINKING CONSTANTLY....it's INSANE!!! I kept up really good with it, until TODAY as I ran around town ragged!!! So another balance of how I can fit it all in.....THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!! IT'S ONLY BEEN TWO WEEKS!!!

On that note...the next FOUR weeks I am entering RIGHT NOW are the craziest for me, as VBS is around the corner. So I will balance this, the family and VBS as well as I can!!! On a GREAT note I have HIT 38 pounds gone! Finally my summer clothes from last year are loose, and the winter stuff I just wore..TOO BIG!!! Pretty wild! People that don't know about the surgery, comment on my hair, or my makeup, or that I just look DIFFERENT but good! HOW fun! Another 38 pounds and they will hopefully do MORE than that!!!

Thanks again for all the prayers and the kind words...and FAITH IN ME. It means absolutely everything to me!!! It REALLY does!

I love you ALL!!!

Love and God's RICHEST Blessings to you,

Linda

It's been a week......27????

Goooooooooodddddd Morning!!!!

WOWOW....this week has been a TRIP!!! Every day has been DIFFERENT, every day has been BETTER, every day has been a BLESSING!!! It's hard to believe it is ALL over...I mean DONE......so intense to wrap my head around that! THIS IS HARD for SURE.....but man, I would rather be concentrating the rest of my life on food that's going to make me HEALTHY and live, than the food that was creating me NOT TOO!!! So this task I am HAPPY to endure for the rest of my life!!!! Especially everyday I see the scale drop, and drop, and DROP!

Wow......seriously??? THIS IS REALITY!!! HOW AWESOME!!!

I have NoT weighed myself today, but I have LOST 27 pounds in three weeks!!! What a trip!



So.......to say this is hard for me is bitter sweet.........seeing those numbers fall, I know will FAR out weigh (no pun intended) the rest of the issues!!! And it IS hard, but I am sooooo excited, I am seeing changes in soooooo many ways already! I AM BLESSED!


So..........a week since surgery and I am gonna say it....STILL ON VICCADIN, and if ANY of you REALLY know me, you will know I do NOT like taking drugs, but I feel I still need it! So at the risk of being miserable and making everyone else miserable....GIVE THEM TO ME!!!


I am healing nicely and am still pretty sore.....guess disconnecting your stomach and making a new one, PLUS hernia surgery, can lead to a bit to pain and healing! But overall I am eating blended up foods and it is wonderful (never thought in a million years I would say that!)!!! I know crazy, but it is nice to have the TASTE of the food, even though the consistency is not there! Next weekend we trek down to Tim's family, as his nephew is graduating High School. New temptations, new experiences.....but I will be able to eat REAL food of protein by Saturday, so that will help me in a social setting!


Ok...well...raining here today! My folks have Dylan for the day, and I am going to focus on my email collection so I can clean it up and keep forging ahead on VBS! Baby steps Linda...remember Baby steps!!!


Wish me luck! Nah.......I don't need any of that!

Love and God's RICHEST Blessings to you,

Linda

OK.......Thank GOD it's Friday!!!

Sooooo.......today is Friday the 14th......just just a mere four days after surgery! WOW......what a road its been...and I am sooooo BEYOND Blessed! All is well! My surgery was GREAT...they also took out a hernia, so that was GREAT!! That was a big part of my stomach issues from Fall till Spring, so I am glad that is OVER!!! Let's talk scars??? So there are 10 spots all over this inflated and deformed stomach of mine! One in which is rather LARGE from the MAJOR area of insertion of LAPRO Surgery land...and the hernia removal!!! Then where the blood DRAIN was.....yeeeeeuck......lets just say...Major HOLE!

OK...enough with all that.....my days in the hospital on the GLORIOUS pain pump, at my BECK AND CALL, are a MERE memory....which made Wednesday at home a bit more difficult. Spreading out time with pills and feeling the pain in between doses of GOOD DRUGS. Let me tell you, I am NOT a FAN of pain killers, or much medicine, but WHY the heck am I gonna keep myself in pain?? This was a MAJOR surgery....bring on the VICADIN, and I did. And it's helped!

So, the BED is NOT a place for me right now.....and besides my Back surgery 20 years ago, I have NEVER wanted a recliner more than I do NOW!!! But the couch and I will be friends for a couple more days!!! This too will pass, and I will once again be with my wonderful SNORING husband!!!

I endured a LONG Teddy Bear picnic for five hours, where DYLAN CURRY was the STAR of the show for sure! So that was awesome....even did a few flights of stairs up and down! Tam, my wonderful Christian friend and Hairstylist, washed and styled my hair for me before hand so I didn't have to deal with that......so I looked nice for the picnic! That was awesome! The guests were Janet, my folk's; Tim's Dad and PJ; Leanne and the STAR's parents all there for him! What a GREAT day! I felt HUMAN!!! And my shirt and pants are already too big to wear, but I had to!!! Loving this! Wowoowowoow!

Home I went.....after the long day....took drugs, and believe it or not, DID NOT PASS OUT....caught up on some TIVO...which was cool, but it all started to become boring...FOUR HOURS OF TV ALL AT ONCE? Come on, when was the last time you did that??? Well, I guess I did it last after my thumb surgery, but when you go like I do ALL the time, it was hard to sit and chill. I was lonely crabby and felt lazy! But today I apologized to my family here, and let em know that I KNOW rest is what I need, and the funk of me going through it will get better!! I have to come to realize that this too shall pass, and it is TRULY what I HAVE to do to get better!!!

I will say, yesterday was my first experience with FOOD in four days...we did scrambled eggs. Quite honestly I was NOT hungry or AM I hungry. Which is hard to say or imagine, but if I do NOT make myself eat I will die...and I don't particularly care for that type of life!!! HAHAHHAH!! I did NOT have a good first impression with food......because I drank too much liquid before I ate and it just had No WHERE to go....so three hours later...UP IT came! GROSSSSSSS.....so I hope to have learned from that mistake.....today I tried tuna and so far so good!!! I can have a protein shake in place of food for one meal, so that will be a bit easier! Baby steps....Linda....baby steps!

So.........Leanne is still here with me through Sunday, and I am starting to feel a bit more human, so I can finally spend some fun time with her these next two days! I am actually having conversations in full sentences and laughing again, so I hope she is seeing the real ME coming through again!

So....each day is new....each day will only get better! The experience at Silver Cross was NOTHING shy of WONDERFUL, and I REALLY mean that! It was just GREAT!!! I look around my house and it is like a floral shop...the plants and flowers people sent!!! And all the MEALS and food?? My word, I just wish I could eat it...hahhahha! To say my family soooo happy, is a complete understatement! Oh my...I am glad all of these gifts are a reminder, because most of my first two days are a BLUR! Sorry about the drugs...they took any sense of my being totally away from me! Now, a few bandages, a belly band, and some pain still haunt me..........as well as my poor black and blue arms from all the needles( I am A JUNKY....hahhhahhaa)!!! All in all...I am GREAT for what I endured!!!!!

I AM blessed with wonderful family being here for me, from afar or close; being supportive for me now and in this awesome new future that is before me; ALL the prayers and love I have received and KEEP receiving; a wonderful husband who is soooo excited for me and OUR new life together; and kids who know I will be here for THEM!!! I am BLESSED I woke up after the surgery (completely in la la land)....and that I had an AWESOME surgeon who did what I needed and then SOME!!! The blessings WILL keep coming, and it is sooo hard to keep thanking GOD for them...hard in a humbled way!!! I will NOT stop thanking him!!!

Thanks to my GROUP of BMI new friends, for we will ALWAYS have this incredible bond between us of friendship and support! It was wild to take our hourly strolls through the hospital and visit as we all shared the same BOND of surgery and wellness! So GREAT to know we are all going through the same things!

Ok.....so there ya have it....my week so far! Life is good.....feeling a bit more human and like myself, and soooooo excited to see what each week comes!

Thanks for loving me soooooo much...it means EVERYTHING to me!

Love and God's RICHEST Blessings to you,

Linda

Less than 10 hours!!!

OK!!!! Here I go!!! Less than 10 hours....and how am I....HOW AM I??? Freakin' excited! I am without words......crazy??? Yes!! I am OVERWHELMED with the cards, emails, texts and phone calls...and PRAYERS......ALREADY!!! I had some moments of great CHEER this morning........very little anxiety. WEIRD!!! A day filled with JOY!!! So....here I sit at 10:30, a little bit nervous, a little bit anxious, a little bit scared, and a LOT excited!!! I have been surrounded by love and prayers and family and friends!

I AM SOOOOOO BLESSED!!!

And by 11:00 or so I will be in my private room....wishing for ice chips and pain medicine!!! But I will KNOW that THIS is the RIGHT thing!!! I know that have people BACKING me up in PRAYER and I know GOD is SOOOOOO with me!

So here's a HUGE "Goodbye old Linda"...and a HUGE "Hello to your NEW LIFE"!!! Thank GOD I have all these people surrounding me, on my side, without even truly knowing what is yet to come...UNCONDITIONALLY!!! They take me that way....before, NOW and for this great future!!! The journeys long......but I have soooo many people on my side...I AM BLESSED!!!

Thanks for YOUR love, prayers and support.......because GOD IS GONNA CARRY ME....but YOU all are gonna keep me lifted along the way!!

LOVE YOU ALL.......Here goes EVERYTHING!!!!

Love and God's RICHEST Blessings to you,

Linda

Got THE CALL!!!!

Sooooo.....just over an hour ago I received THE CALL!! I feel like I just won free tickets to a concert on the radio! LOL.....but I got THE CALL about what time I am coming in for surgery! YEAH BABY bring IT on! I am soooooo excited! I am the FIRST surgery of the morning, so I am SOOOOO excited! 7:30 am, be at the hospital at 6:00!




Wow, the day is almost here and I am just soooo darn happy! I have to say, I wasn't going to step on a scale, but I did at my friends house (it was in the bathroom!) and I have lost 11 pounds already!!!!!! Yippppeeeee yi yay!!! I knew the jeans were smaller, the rings bigger, and my ankles are ANKLES no more swollen feet! Not to mention that I FINALLY feel like myself again...except BETTER! I am soooooo ready for this!!!!


And last night at our prayer group, I had a group of ladies praying JUST for me.....around me...holding me....praying for the doctors and anaesthesiologists.......all of that and healing....well it was AMAZING! I have EVER slept so well in MY life last night!


So....people around me are excited for me, and it is sooooo cool! Thank you all soooooo much!

Now, I have Tag Days this weekend still stressing me out and keeping me from thinking about Monday, but LEANNE is coming in Saturday to stay for the week, and that is AWESOME (we are gonna get her TAGGIN too!)! So there is just SOOOOOO much to be thankful for today!!!

Like EVERY day...right!

Love and God's RICHEST Blessings to you,

Linda

One Week from today!

Wow...has my world turned upside down in a WEEK! From the entire withdrawal process of caffeine, sugar and carbs.....to getting ready for the week ahead.....MAN there is a TON going on! After three days of being lethargic and headaches, I finally felt normal....and better than ever! What was I doing to myself? Yikes! The toxins that came out...the chills, the sweats...you name it, I WAS A JUNKY withdrawing from it all...FOOD! I thought my relationship with food was going to be difficult to forget for a while, but I realized...its ONLY temporary. I have TASTED everything right.......am I DYING? Hmmmm...no VERY much living again....in the manner I should be!

I am doing GREAT! Survived my first dinner party with TONS of food and drinks galore...I was 100% fine! It was cool...even went out to dinner last night, and had to order all special, and cost me more, but I did IT! Looking at their fries was a bit hard...but I kept away from my bad habits of reaching over to that plate and having some....and I DID NOT DO IT! So I am glad I accomplished so much!

This week is busy for me and my family, so that will be good for my mind. Although mentally I DO need to spiritually get myself in a calm healing place now...so I AM READY! And I AM ready!!!!!!!!!

I am sooo glad our surgeons give is this time of two weeks before! I thought they were nuts!! Where's that LAST MEAL??? But come on, would we ever be ready?? I mean EVER??? NOPE......no matter when it was, I soooooo would NOT of been ready! AM I READY today? Oh YES I am........two weeks to get out of the food world I lived in......and the hell that involved, and now this next week...living out just this week as the last time in the first week in May I will EVER be OBESE AGAIN....May 2011 I will NOT....wow....that is soooooooooo EXCITING!

It helps to have the inner family support and outer support...I didn't want to tell everyone I knew, but there are definite key players here who will watch my back and pray for me for sure....not to mention be there for what I REALLY need and not gossip about it!

Then there is the OTHER BMI patients support. About 5 of us exchanged emails, THANK GOD, at our 4 hour seminar. We have all been talking through the week....experiencing the same fears, likes, dislikes....it's interesting! We will ALL be in the hospital the same days....so we will all see each other again! I think these are friends that I will have forever because of our bond! And they will ALWAYS "get it"!!

Well.....this is the very first BLOG I have ever done....and I am PROUD to be doing it! I wanted a place for people to see what's happenin, and quite honestly, ME as well! I lived through many people's blogs over the course of my intense research, and I found these to be AWESOME!!!

Gotta go have a protein shake and carry on my day...

Love and God's RICHEST Blessings to you

Linda